Real life. Why does a woman need her own apartment if she has a family and is not going to divorce


I feel like my relationship with my husband is slipping through my hands. The situation is getting worse every day.

 Real life. Why does a woman need her own apartment if she has a family and is not going to divorce

And for everything I want to thank his mother who spreads nonsense. I don't want to sell the apartment to take out a joint mortgage, and my mother-in-law yells that if the woman doesn't plan to leave her family, she doesn't need a separate apartment.

Are you wondering? Nonsense, of course. But this has already been said so many times that the husband began to believe it. And now, after her mother, she repeats this nonsense. My arguments and common sense are not helping. It was impossible to reach for the mother-in-law before, and the husband began to separate himself.

During my three years of marriage, I thought we were overall doing well. I have an apartment, although it needs renovation, but you don't have to rent it. My husband works hard, and neither do I sit idle. Perfect starting positions to start your family life.

Of course you cannot live in a studio apartment all your life as there will be children who will also need their own room. Therefore, in the future, you need a larger apartment or even your own home, but this is the perfect dream. And I didn't see any problems with that.

The plan was: we live in my apartment, we work hard and we earn a mortgage, and if we are lucky at work, then for the whole apartment. Yes, it's not a quick process, it's all clear, but if you sit down at exactly the fifth point it will be even longer.

The most sensitive part of the plan was the possible decree. I agreed, both for myself and my husband, that there would be a decree once we had solved the housing problem. We are young, we have nothing to rush to do. Let's take an apartment, albeit with a mortgage, and then you will be able to go on maternity leave. My husband will be working, my apartment will be rented and we will pull it out.

M & oacute; j my husband agreed with me, such a plan seemed quite effective to him. And we started putting it into practice. But apart from my husband, my mother-in-law also decided to express her valuable opinion. She did it less than a year after we got married.

My husband's mother was not pleased that we were not in a hurry with the children. In her opinion, we have a roof over our heads, so we have to give birth right away, so that we can go to the maternity hospital for the second baby.

We explained our plans, how and what we wanted to do, if it would be more convenient, but it did not suit the mother-in-law. She said it was all rubbish that we'll discover later.

– You'll save gray hair for your apartment. Now prices are soaring. And when will the baby be born? Retired?

I tried to defend my position – I do not want to cower with my child in a studio apartment, and then live from month to month, because one husband will earn money for a family. So we spoil our lives, and it is not known yet when we will buy an apartment. But my mother-in-law also had an answer ready for that.

She offered to sell my flat now to give this money as a down payment for our shared flat. And then the apartment we buy, we rent. Where are they ?! To her with a child at the mercy …

– So what? Many live that way, and more – and even worse. You're the one who came up with something incredible!

Of course, I didn't like this plan. My husband's mother is an absurdly noisy woman who is hard to deal with even in my own territory, much less hers. And I didn't dream about living with her under one roof. The mother-in-law lives on a piece of the floor, so we will have to move into one small room. So what's the point of all this confusion?

And I certainly do not want to sell my own apartment in order to convert it into an advance payment for a shared apartment. With this option, the husband does not lose anything, but I lose a separate personal property. I also presented this argument.

Why put all your eggs in one basket? Eventually, the question of buying an apartment for our child will appear. And here you don't have to buy anything – the apartment will already be there.

Mother-in-law took everything her own way. She said it would be a long time before our child needed his own apartment. First, this baby must be born. Yes, and the motive seemed suspicious to her.

– You seem to be preparing your own escape routes. Why would a woman need her own apartment if she has a family and is not going to get a divorce? – It got to me.

Though the crap came only from her, it wasn't scary, although it was extremely annoying. But for about a year, I have been hearing similar statements from my husband who repeats his mother's thought, but in other words.

He began to suspect that I was in no hurry to be born with him, because I was looking for a better option, and in the event of a divorce, I would go to my own apartment. These conclusions were the cause of our frequent quarrels.

I am confused and do not know how to proceed. The heart demands that the husband be heard, not spoil the relationship. After all, living with my mother-in-law for a while is not the worst thing that happens in the world. Yes, and with the apartment, the problem has been resolved.

But my mind says that the original plan is perfect, and my mother-in-law is hiding something, and she's trying to bend me under her for a reason. And the husband just goes with the mother. If I bend, I can get into big trouble.

This may also interest you: Marek Kondrat made an exceptionally honest confession about his wife. What prevents him from his partner, almost four decades younger.

See what we wrote about in recent days: Krzysztof Krawczyk Junior made a sincere confession about his son. “There are some doubts, not only on my part & rdquo;


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